i’m 30 weeks pregnant and very stressed about this,can someone please give some advice?
11:56 pm in Insurance jobs and educations by The Broker
My fiance,his brother,and i live at his mother’s 3 bedroom trailer.
We (my fiance and i) pay her $400 a month for rent. I am 30 weeks pregnant today,and i had to take early maternity leave, because i was having signs of preterm labor. The job didn’t pay much anyway it was part-time (tried to get full-time, but they didn’t have positions for full-time) the most that job ever paid me was $92 but that was still money. My fiance was working as a landscaper/grounds worker,but he got laid off because the person who he replaced came back,but that was a full-time job and he got about $276 a week. I’m going through the welfare office for my medical, because there is no way i can pay the doctor bills and hospital bill in the future. My fiance is now working at the college full-time but it only pays $8 an hour and they take out about $80 in tax’s. We pay his mom $100 a week,our bed is $48 a week (we still have 37 weeks yet to completely pay it off), we pay $20 a month on a credit card my fiance got to help out his mother so she/us wouldn’t be homeless (she was behind on mortgage,fuel which is our heating,and everything). We have everything for the baby,just after he’s born we’ll need to put back money for his diapers,wipes, and stuff he’ll need.
Travis (my fiance brother) is not working, he works on the car and takes everyone to work,and has company over almost everyday,him and my fiance fight constantly over stupid stuff.
Sherry (my going to be mother in law) just switched jobs, she went from making $8.30 an hour geting paid week in town to $11 an hour geting paid bi-weekly and it’s a 45 min drive. She’s working full-time.
In july Travis dad moved in here, he was on disablity and ssi, for some reason they took away his ssi, so he got $535 a month and he paid sherry $400 a month as well. He’s bipolar and has diabetees,he also has an addiction to snuff. His van completely broke down a week or two ago.
Ok here’s where i’m fineally trying to get at, on tuesday of this week they (travis and his dad) were working on the van with the parts that sherry bought that the van needed,Well as soon as they got done putting the parts on,Travis was joking around with his dad and smack him in the butt and i guess it hit him in the private part too, Larry (travis’s dad) got super mad,and grabbed a metal pipe and threatened to beat travis with it. That day sherry kicked him out.
So she kicked him out on tuesday,and later that day we got a phone call from the hospital in harrissburg,pa saying that larry’s van broke down and he was walking and he fell over on the road, so an abulance came and took him to the hospital,it turns out he had nothing to eat that day and he also had an bad infection in his right foot that was turning black. After he got out of the hospital, he went to his wife’s (who he left to be with sherry in july) house (in harrissburg,pa),and tryed talking her into taking him back,and she said no. So, i don’t know how, but he got put into a treatment center here in town (shippensburg,pa),and we got a phone call yesturday from them asking if he can come back here,and we told them no (this was when sherry was at work).
Well, i told sherry they called and what all was said,this morning she calls all of us out and she just now tells us that,she’s behind one month on the mortgage,and she’s behind on the phone bill,and she’s behine on the cable,and we have no fuel tanks (no heating),her car isn’t inspected, she has to pay car insurance this month,and our food stamps got taken away when larry was here, because they said we had to much income.
And now she’s talking about bringing larry back for the money,and my fiance yelled at her and said “i don’t want that crazy person around my kid” and i agree about that. Her response was “he needs his meds, and i need the money”.
I don’t know what to do, because if we (my fiance and i) move out that means well have to pay more that $400 a month and we can barely even pay that $400 a month right now. And if we stay here we have to deal with is mom’s money problems and if she lets larry back in i don’t think he’ll be better even on his meds. I don’t want to put my kid in danger. Also if we don’t get heating my kid can get sick and die and i don’t want that.
Travis claims he’s looking for a job,but he hasn’t worked since i got pregnant and that was in late march early april. Everytime we tell him to look for a job he gets all made and starts flipping out.
My fiance and i, have been waiting to get married since last year and stuff like this keep happening to where we can’t do anything anymore. We can’t save up for a place,we can’t save up for a car, hell i can’t even get enough money for my 2 Ged tests that i need to pass. And i can’t get a good job without that.
I just wish there was something else we could do, if there is, we need to know now.
This is too stressful for me and it isn’t good being pregnant and all.
Please give us som
27 weeks pregnant with Grant Ray said on April 2, 2012
You need to get in touch with someone who can help you with finding an apt. that goes by your income. They are available. You need to get yourself out of the funny farm.
Sherry needs to drop the cable anyways, and as far as food stamps go, she couldn’t of lost them that quick, unless she called welfare and told them she was getting extra income from another person, they wouldn’t have found out that quick. So, get the hell out of there before that baby is born, don’t put his life in this mess also!
PlNk pEaRlS said on April 2, 2012
Hey,
First, where do you live (I mean, in the city, suburbs, or out in the country)? I think you should move out. I know you’re broke, but please hear me out. I always think it’s a bad idea for couples to live with the in-laws. If you’re mature enough to be living together and having a baby, you should be able to have your own place (even if it’s a dump). It cuts back on 90% of the family conflicts. I know you’re broke, but there are things you can do to change that.
Why can’t your fiance get a new job (or work 2 jobs if that’s what it takes)? I just can’t unederstand why he can’t make more than $8/hour. He would make more than that as a garbage man or a janitor. He could try working a 2nd part time job. Or he could get a job for a cell phone store (my husband does that and makes $9/hr + commission, so he makes $35,000/year. Some pay more. It’s not that glamorous, but it’s keeping the bills paid. He just graduated from college and is having a hard time finding a job in his field.)
Apply for aide. I’m sure you can get welfare, WIC, and foodstamps on such a limited income. Usually, if you have a very low income, you can go to community college for little or no money. It would open a lot more doors for the both of you.
My first apartment (2007) was only $375/month. It was tiny & not very glamorous, but it was cheap, it was a roof over our heads, and my husband and I were on our own without help from anyone. I don’t know how we did it, but the money always seemed to come together.
From now on, only buy what you can afford. Don’t use credit cards anymore & stop making payments on beds and things like that.
PS– why did you say, “We just can’t afford to get married”? It costs like $20 to get a marriage license. You could get married at the courthouse. It would make your car insurance cheaper, your health insurance would be less of a hassle, and you’d all have the same last name…. for $20…
punnta20062007 said on April 2, 2012
1st and foremost put god first.you have to have faith i feel that you and your boyfriend move out you will make it if you keep saying that you can’t afford it you wont be able to just step out on faith you will just have to budget your money and for as you going out on leave QUIT LETTING THOSE THINGS GET TO YOU BEFORE YOU A LITTLE BUNDLE OF JOY EARLY AND YOU DONT WONT THAT PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE GET PLENTY OF REST AND LET THE REST GO
Jenifer C said on April 2, 2012
Hun, this is like reading a novel, try to get help from your state government with food and such so you have more money for bills. Good luck and try not to stress
jo j said on April 2, 2012
Sell your story to Days of Our Lives! No seriously, why did you drop out of school, why did you get pregnant, especially out of wedlock? Why don’t you sell the computer you are on now and stop internet services and use THAT money for the baby.
I feel sorry for your baby! Quit being a drain on society and stand up and take care of your baby and yourself. It appears the useless sperm donor, not father because that he isn’t, will be of no use to you or the baby. You need get away from these hillbillys and start new.
Baby Klear Due Oct 8. said on April 2, 2012
If you move out on your own, especially since you will be having a baby soon, you and your fiance will qualify for food stamps, and possibly some other government assistance, if you are living on your own. You really dont need to put your baby in that kind of situation. As for transportation, do they have a bus route or something there?
JB said on April 2, 2012
First of all why are you putting all your business on this website for the world to see. It sounds like you need a therapist. You may not want to hear what I have to say, but once you have this baby you are going to struggle for the rest of your life, so you need to give the baby up for adoption.You and your bf are not fit parents financially or emotionally wise. If you want help from the government then you need to leave him and sign up for section 8. You have to go to a shelter, but at least your baby will be in a safe environment. Because if the state finds out how your attempting to raise this child they my take him from you anyways. Truthfully with all the stress you are having your baby may not make it, so calm down stop stressing and go to your local welfare office. You can also try churches, food banks, and other places for sources of help. Just like you got on this site and put your business out there, get on the web and research some help for you and your CHILD. The government does not take to nicely of helping grown men that don’t work, but they will help a lazy mother. Not to say that you are lazy, but I hope this motivates you. Because we have enough children in the who would have so much more potential if they had better upbringing. Please get some help for your baby!!